Tonight I sat in a booth at a wings restaurant with a friend who knows me well. We were discussing some pretty heavy things when my friend looked at me and said, “Cassandra Hendon, where do you think we’ll be in five years?”
What a question. I honestly didn’t have any clue.
It’s not a profound question. It’s repeated often in job interviews. It’s lectured in business schools – “A Five-Year Plan.” But for me, it gave me pause. There’s been a lot of talk around me lately about forward motion. Moving to a new place, a new level.
But where do I think I’ll be in five years? I haven’t thought about it. I’ve been so concerned with the “now”, with what’s right immediately in front of me, with a reactionary sort of life, immediately responding to the dilemma, tasks, or goals right in front of my face, that I haven’t ever thought of where I’m headed. So where am I going?
Tonight I sit here and question myself. What do I want? Do I have the courage to even dream, to think that there could be something possible for me outside what is in front of me, outside of the swirl of the business of life?
So here are some things I want for my life. Real, honest, brave things that I’m saying, acknowledging to everyone.
I want to be completely in love with Jesus. I want to pursue a love relationship with Jesus so fervently that it drives every decision I make, even the small ones. I want to be the woman of God I used to think I could be as a child, before I saw people fall, before disappointment jaded my view of Christians and of myself. I want to live above mediocrity. I want to pursue Jesus above all else – above the mundane, above my own desires for comfort, for fulfillment, for satisfaction. I want to consistently fix my eyes on Jesus, not on my circumstances, not on my schedule, not on whether I’m too tired, too burned out, too busy, too lazy. I want to guard my relationship with him so zealously that nothing can come between him and me. Instead of being a Gomer, I want to be faithful, through and through. I want everything in my life to flow out of the time that I spend with him, so that I’m not shaken in hard times.
I want love. I want it in the right time and I want it in the right person. I don’t want love for love’s sake, or because I feel my clock ticking, or because “everyone else” has love. I want it because I was formed to want it, I was created to love a man, to be a helper to him, to support him in his pursuit of being who God has called him to be (and through that support, fulfill part of my own purpose as a woman), to have his children and love them and raise them to love the Lord. I’m tired of pretending that love is gross or overrated or not for me just because I don’t have it right now. Whether I get it or not, I want it. Maybe within five years, maybe not, but whenever God sees fit to bring me to the one He made me for.
I want to rescue children. I want to take in children who are abused and neglected and become a foster parent. I also want to reach out to women (both in the US and abroad) considering abortion. I want to approach them in a new, unorthodox way that transcends judgment. I want to go to other countries like China where abortion isn’t a big deal, where it’s offered as after-the-fact birth control, and minister destiny and hope to women contemplating it. I want to save babies from death by introducing women to a God of purpose and love. I want to use creative methods to take an inflammatory political issue and put a face and a name to it, to make it less about left and right and more about wrong and right. I want my friends, who are the most creative people in the world, to play a part in this.
I want to write and record songs. I want to write songs that bring hope to people, songs that transport people to the throne room of heaven, songs that stir people up, songs full of the Word of God that pop into peoples’ heads in decision-making times and help them discover and do God’s will.
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Connected by the Covenant
Most of us know what it is to feel that something about you "counts you out" of the better things in life. Whether it's your looks, your talent (or lack thereof), your social skills... I think at one time or another, we have all felt that we don't have what it takes. We often look at the promises that God has given to others and wonder, "What about me?"
This happened to me recently. I was so excited to hear an awesome prophetic word spoken over a friend. Yet later, when I stopped to think, I realized that no one had ever spoken a prophetic word about me. What about ME? My thoughts then went down that all-too-familiar "I'm not cut out for this" or "I don't have what it takes" path. And pretty soon, my friend's joy became my own self-centered pity party!
I've been studying Romans, and somehow this study has led me to think a little about the story of Abraham and Sarah. Abraham was a great man of faith. In fact, Paul held him up as the archetype by which we should model ourselves concerning faith. Over seven times in Genesis, God mentioned or promised to him that he would have many descendents and become a great nation. If anyone had a great prophetic word spoken over them, it was this guy! Especially in the face of his age and his own wife's inability to bear children, this guy stood fast. But what about Sarah?
Here's Sarah, hearing all of these great accounts of the wonderful words that God has spoken to her husband about how he's going to make him a great nation, and give him many descendants. But this woman is barren. Even early in Genesis (11:30) before any promises were made to Abraham by God, she's referred to as barren. This was a long-standing problem. And no doubt, Sarah felt that she was not enough, didn't have what it would take to help God's promise come to pass, and was counted out of this promise. In fact, we can see this in how she offered up her servant, Hagar, so that she could help God out in keeping his promise. We can even see her attitude towards herself in the way she speaks to Abram: "See now, the Lord has restrained me from bearing children. Please, go in to my maid; perhaps I shall obtain children by her."
This is a woman who looks at herself and her own inability and immediately counts herself out. In fact, she thinks that even GOD has counted her out. But what she doesn't realize is that because she is in a covenant relationship with her husband, God's promises to her husband will come through HER, because God honors that covenant and would never do anything in a round-about way. The promise of God isn't for everyone else but you. It is for YOU, because you are in covenant with HIM!
And thinking about it, the same goes for other covenant relationships you are in. If you're committed to a church body, and great words have been spoken over that church, it's time to start taking those words personally and grabbing ahold of them for YOUR life. I've heard too many times that a waterfall is about to break forth at City of Life and passively nodded or said "amen." But it's time to stop passivity. This is MY promise. This waterfall is for MY life. I will see signs. I will see wonders. It's not for everyone else BUT me. I don't have to be smart enough, anointed enough, beautiful enough, talented enough, or ENOUGH of anything to qualify for the promise of God! I'm included in the promise JUST as I am because God honors the connection that I have with the house and with Him. And you're included too!
And another quick note. In Romans, it says in chapter 4, verse 19 and 20, that Abraham was not weak in faith and didn't waver. It's easy to skim past that and take it at face value, but when we think of the whole Hagar fiasco, then we see that, yeah, Abraham did have moments where he didn't trust God. Where he did waver. Yet he didn't camp out in his doubt or his wavering. And that is what sets the great men and women of faith apart. Yes, they may have faltered. Yes, they may have sinned. But they didn't stay there. After their sin, they got up, dusted themselves off, and kept pressing forward. And because of their entire walk, not just one moment of failure, or even one HUGE mistake (like Ishmael), God called them "not weak in faith" and unwavering. Isn't that cool? Momentary moments of doubt don't downgrade your status as a woman or man of faith. God sees the whole picture. If you are a person who sometimes struggles, sometimes questions, but overall presses forward and keeps going despite faltering, you are still called "faithful" in His eyes!
Realize that God's promises are for you. Who you are doesn't count you out, because God likes you and takes great delight in You. If you'll stay faithful, you will see His promises come to pass in you and through you.
And if you happen to have tripped up in your faith and your pursuit of God, don't stay on the ground. Get up! Keep going!
"God-loyal people don't stay down long. Soon they're up on their feet." (Prov 24:16 MSG)
This happened to me recently. I was so excited to hear an awesome prophetic word spoken over a friend. Yet later, when I stopped to think, I realized that no one had ever spoken a prophetic word about me. What about ME? My thoughts then went down that all-too-familiar "I'm not cut out for this" or "I don't have what it takes" path. And pretty soon, my friend's joy became my own self-centered pity party!
I've been studying Romans, and somehow this study has led me to think a little about the story of Abraham and Sarah. Abraham was a great man of faith. In fact, Paul held him up as the archetype by which we should model ourselves concerning faith. Over seven times in Genesis, God mentioned or promised to him that he would have many descendents and become a great nation. If anyone had a great prophetic word spoken over them, it was this guy! Especially in the face of his age and his own wife's inability to bear children, this guy stood fast. But what about Sarah?
Here's Sarah, hearing all of these great accounts of the wonderful words that God has spoken to her husband about how he's going to make him a great nation, and give him many descendants. But this woman is barren. Even early in Genesis (11:30) before any promises were made to Abraham by God, she's referred to as barren. This was a long-standing problem. And no doubt, Sarah felt that she was not enough, didn't have what it would take to help God's promise come to pass, and was counted out of this promise. In fact, we can see this in how she offered up her servant, Hagar, so that she could help God out in keeping his promise. We can even see her attitude towards herself in the way she speaks to Abram: "See now, the Lord has restrained me from bearing children. Please, go in to my maid; perhaps I shall obtain children by her."
This is a woman who looks at herself and her own inability and immediately counts herself out. In fact, she thinks that even GOD has counted her out. But what she doesn't realize is that because she is in a covenant relationship with her husband, God's promises to her husband will come through HER, because God honors that covenant and would never do anything in a round-about way. The promise of God isn't for everyone else but you. It is for YOU, because you are in covenant with HIM!
And thinking about it, the same goes for other covenant relationships you are in. If you're committed to a church body, and great words have been spoken over that church, it's time to start taking those words personally and grabbing ahold of them for YOUR life. I've heard too many times that a waterfall is about to break forth at City of Life and passively nodded or said "amen." But it's time to stop passivity. This is MY promise. This waterfall is for MY life. I will see signs. I will see wonders. It's not for everyone else BUT me. I don't have to be smart enough, anointed enough, beautiful enough, talented enough, or ENOUGH of anything to qualify for the promise of God! I'm included in the promise JUST as I am because God honors the connection that I have with the house and with Him. And you're included too!
And another quick note. In Romans, it says in chapter 4, verse 19 and 20, that Abraham was not weak in faith and didn't waver. It's easy to skim past that and take it at face value, but when we think of the whole Hagar fiasco, then we see that, yeah, Abraham did have moments where he didn't trust God. Where he did waver. Yet he didn't camp out in his doubt or his wavering. And that is what sets the great men and women of faith apart. Yes, they may have faltered. Yes, they may have sinned. But they didn't stay there. After their sin, they got up, dusted themselves off, and kept pressing forward. And because of their entire walk, not just one moment of failure, or even one HUGE mistake (like Ishmael), God called them "not weak in faith" and unwavering. Isn't that cool? Momentary moments of doubt don't downgrade your status as a woman or man of faith. God sees the whole picture. If you are a person who sometimes struggles, sometimes questions, but overall presses forward and keeps going despite faltering, you are still called "faithful" in His eyes!
Realize that God's promises are for you. Who you are doesn't count you out, because God likes you and takes great delight in You. If you'll stay faithful, you will see His promises come to pass in you and through you.
And if you happen to have tripped up in your faith and your pursuit of God, don't stay on the ground. Get up! Keep going!
"God-loyal people don't stay down long. Soon they're up on their feet." (Prov 24:16 MSG)
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Rend the Heavens
Isaiah 64
1 Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down,
that the mountains would tremble before you!
2 As when fire sets twigs ablaze
and causes water to boil,
come down to make your name known to your enemies
and cause the nations to quake before you!
3 For when you did awesome things that we did not expect,
you came down, and the mountains trembled before you.
4 Since ancient times no one has heard,
no ear has perceived,
no eye has seen any God besides you,
who acts on behalf of those who wait for him.
5 You come to the help of those who gladly do right,
who remember your ways.
But when we continued to sin against them,
you were angry.
How then can we be saved?
6 All of us have become like one who is unclean,
and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags;
we all shrivel up like a leaf,
and like the wind our sins sweep us away.
7 No one calls on your name
or strives to lay hold of you;
for you have hidden your face from us
and made us waste away because of our sins.
8 Yet, O LORD, you are our Father.
We are the clay, you are the potter;
we are all the work of your hand.
9 Do not be angry beyond measure, O LORD;
do not remember our sins forever.
Oh, look upon us, we pray,
for we are all your people.
10 Your sacred cities have become a desert;
even Zion is a desert, Jerusalem a desolation.
11 Our holy and glorious temple, where our fathers praised you,
has been burned with fire,
and all that we treasured lies in ruins.
12 After all this, O LORD, will you hold yourself back?
Will you keep silent and punish us beyond measure?
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Long Distance
I use my blog as a place to record ideas, wisdom, and quotes from other people that I want to remember. I found this in Aaron Stern's blog (aaronstern.typepad.com), and thought it was pretty revelatory. Before I read this, I didn't believe long distance relationships were workable, and I certainly never wanted to be involved in one. He changed my mind. Props to Aaron!
"I know several people who don’t like long-distance relationships – they are a lot of work and can be a hassle. However, I actually think that there are several benefits to dating from a distance. Talking on the phone or interacting online requires the development of one of the most important variables in a relationship – communication. Without the “distractions” of things to do and places to go, the only thing you have left is what you talk about. Such a heavy emphasis on talking requires diligent work on communicating thoroughly and clearly, establishing expectations and resolving conflicts. From my perspective, if things don’t work long-distance, they likely wouldn’t work living in the same city. That being said, if the relationship is going towards marriage, I recommend that you have a good period of time together in the same city prior to marriage (3-6 months minimum). Though developing good communication is important, it can’t replace that which is learned as you interact in person on a daily basis."
"I know several people who don’t like long-distance relationships – they are a lot of work and can be a hassle. However, I actually think that there are several benefits to dating from a distance. Talking on the phone or interacting online requires the development of one of the most important variables in a relationship – communication. Without the “distractions” of things to do and places to go, the only thing you have left is what you talk about. Such a heavy emphasis on talking requires diligent work on communicating thoroughly and clearly, establishing expectations and resolving conflicts. From my perspective, if things don’t work long-distance, they likely wouldn’t work living in the same city. That being said, if the relationship is going towards marriage, I recommend that you have a good period of time together in the same city prior to marriage (3-6 months minimum). Though developing good communication is important, it can’t replace that which is learned as you interact in person on a daily basis."
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Practicing the Presence
"Sustained communication with God requires restrained conversation with man."
-Mike Bickle
-Mike Bickle
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Wake Me Up
"We are fast asleep and we don't know it... The thing that is dulling this generation is called The Spirit of Religion... The Spirit of Religion settles us into thinking we know something about God when in reality we don't know anything about God. It settles us into a false complacency thinking that we have all these things figured out and I want to tell you when the Spirit of Revelation is in a person's life, they realize that they are at the beginning of the beginning of the beginning of the beginning of the beginning of a shoreless ocean that has yet to be expounded upon. The Spirit of Religion is choking the life from the church because it's settling us into false complacency and we need to go after God waking us up into what reality is."
-Corey Russell
-Corey Russell
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
